Part I: Beginning in Scientology (Dates, places have been omitted).
I was 16. I met a person in my city while continuing with my schooling. I was in my last year of college and getting ready for university. I had some trouble with communication and one of my uncle knew a guy who could help me with this. I went to his Office (I will omit some data to keep it short). I then did the communication course there. I like it a lot and find out that I could communicate. I was not shy anymore… I then was sent to the org by that guy. I did receive some auditing from a student. Was not bad but I did not know what we were doing. Not sure ????? a bit confusion. I know now that the student was horrible but OK he was a student. I was excited because I was still young and getting interested. I was ready promotion fliers on what Ron did. Was great and amazing. Then came two guys in strange uniforms. In fact 2 SO members. They told me about the ship, Ron, the Sea Org, OT III…. was exciting. I was young, had trouble with my family and this was an opportunity to get out of all this. They promise me an apartment, money, job, auditing, courses for free. Was great. Then I quite college and told my parent I was going. They were fine after meeting those 2 guys. When I arrive there, I did the EFP, was horrible. Cleaning up old building which was sold later one. The building was sold because it was in front of a Psych hospital. The SO member who did the job of buying it got onto the RPF for this. Anyway, managed to get through. On the EPF the food was bad, and even sometimes NO FOOD AT ALL. BAD no ?
Then I finished it and went to my org. Got into a post I did not want but did it. I did not have the choice. After few months I wanted to leave BUT I stayed there because I had stopped my schooling, no diplomas, no future. Now I know this is not true but this is how I was looking at it when I was 17. So I stay. I learnt English there. Was difficult but manage to do OK at it. For a while I was going on study because I was new and not much attention was on me. Then I started to do very well at what I was doing. Then the attention was on me. I was being demanded to do more and more. It was difficult and less study to learn about my post. Then after a year and a half, I started to do false reports in my stats. Then I came clean on it but got shot with a comm ev as a first gradient. What an application of the ethics gradient isn’t it ? Then got in more trouble and did not know what to do. New, no tech ???? my first friend worked in HCO and told me what to do. I sent a telex to RTC about it. It came down as a rocket on my org. I did not get into trouble for this. Everything was cancelled. In fact my senior was doing worse out ethics than me She is the one who got shot for this and onto the RPF. Then I met a girl and we got married. She got pregnant no long after. We got into trouble for this but at that time we could go to a class V org. Then we went. (I skipped some stuff here). Then got into that org. Went well for a while. Then our 2D did not do well. After some time I left back to the SO. (again I skipped some stuff here). In fact I was recalled in between to the CLO for a major Int Event evolution. I was the I/C for a continent. For 3 months, I had 1 to 2 hours of sleep daily. It was difficult and stupid I think. We would have produce even more with some sleep. The event went OK. Highest Ever attendance. So I was happy. I went back to my org. I was sleeping on my desk for 2 weeks almost daily. My body went into shock. Then it was fine. Well now our 2D went bad and got some marriage counseling which did not handle it. Well I went back to the Sea Org base. Got into an org. Got posted immediately. Oh, I re did the EPF. This took 10 days. Nothing to say about it. Went fast and was OK. During that time on org was going St Hill Size so I was put into that one. Went onto post. My English was not that great at that time. I worked hard at it by reading books, listening to lectures…. Then I wanted to leave because I missed my kid. They got me in session, sec checks, threatened me that I could be declared… I got scared that I could not see my kid anymore. So I stayed. Life went on. Did better and better on my post. I made good friends with some GREAT people. One especially who helped me daily for more than a year. After that I did even better. Great stats, great commendation from a lot of people and even Int Exec. I continued and got promoted to a higher post. Was tough at the beginning but did well. The org did very well as a result of my actions. Not only mine but I contributed BIG TIME TO IT. Then some execs took advantages of me and got me to do stuff which resulted in good statistics. They took the credit for it. I was upsets and crashed my stats. SERVICE FACSIMILE
Then got Comm Ev for it. Then management was going crazy trying to find out what the fuck was going wrong. I asked to see my ethics files. OF COURSE, there were plenty of false reports written on me. I sent a KR to RTC with evidences that those KRs were wrong. I had commendations from those guys who were saying I was unproductive…. I skip some parts here. Then the comm ev was cancelled. I went back on post and the stats took off again in my area. I became responsible for over 20 people. All of them did well. Of course with some difficulties some times. Not everything was fine. More was demanded. Less sleep, less study…. some guys left the SO. I wanted to as well but did not know what I would do outside and I was afraid not to see my kid again….
Then I managed to be sent on tour time to time to do events. This was great. I could get out, see people, meet wog too in airports, cities… and as well I could visit new places. So it was good. Came back every time….. i skip some stuff.
Then I got promoted again. I had much much more responsibilities and this is when I started to really look at stuff. Only on that type of post, you start to really see much more about the church. Finances, staff, Execs levels what is going on, the truth of the executive structures…. And at that point, this is when I started to SEE ……… And this is maybe why the church is afraid that I speak. Why? some truth they don’t want people to know about ………
I would not say that I was highly ranked SO member but I did have some responsibilities. Highly ranked would be RTC, Exec Strata. This is what I think. So I travelled a lot in between. I then arrived at the HGB in Los Angeles…. I was told that I was not qualified for the Sea Org. This was so funny because I had been in there for so long already. Then it was a mistake done by the Security guy. Funny isn’t it? the guy did not know what the Fuck he was speaking about. Then I got posted at a higher post…. as mentioned earlier. I had view to the scientology finances, postings in orgs, what was going on in some orgs… Then I can tell you the truth on the fact that Scientology is interested in MONEY, MONEY, MONEY. They want MONEY and MONEY and MONEY. The delivery is what MAKES THE MONEY and to GET MORE MONEY from people. The wins, the new releases…. is for more MONEY. Posting people in key areas in orgs is to get more money again and again. I was myself pushed to get more money and everyone was made to produce for more money. So I am stopping now with the money stuff. The church is loaded with money. It has account with millions of dollars and 10 of thousands going in there weekly. If the GI stat is down, this is a big ETHICS actions. If the delivery stats are down, this is bad but not like if the GI is down. The building are own by scientology but the orgs have to pay rent to management. The rent for one specific org is about $10,000 a week so management can get money. At one point, I was going to be promoted to a higher post. I was asked who could replace me. I had a junior who was a very good friend who I proposed. They told me that it could not because he was a key person who the GI production line. Then a month or 2 later, there was an evolution to send people to FSO and INT management. He was one of the few qualified to go. He was taken right away and replace not qualified for the job and who did not want to do it. I then raised hell for it, and I was of course and block to the evolution and out ethics. I would be investigated for this. I shut off of course to keep quiet in my area. Then I was forced to come down from my executive position to handled this area of the org and to make some money for the org. Of course again, I was told I was more interested in making personnal money because I was not doing the function of my post. When mentionning the removal of my junior and replaced by someone unqualified, I got shot. I got a court of ethics, in fact an Executive court of ethics which is in fact the same stuff. I got lower condition, amends to make to executives above me…. Weird. I did it, I did not have the choice.
Then life became difficult and not fun. I was there doing the job because I had nothing else to do. Then came the release of the basics. This became hell. No study, no sleep…. I already explained all this in the Thread “Hi new here”. I wanted to get out at that point. I did not know how. I was married to this beautiful, nice, incredible girl. I love her. I had a kid that I do not see anymore. I love her and so does she. I know that she wants to see me but she knows that I am declared and all the family is scientologist. Anyway, then during the basics evolution, it was difficult, no sleep…. as mentioned earlier and I won’t explain it again. One major exec was also getting major donations from scientologist. One time I did a registration cycle with him. I was shocked. He lied so much to that couple and got over 30,000 from them. He promised auditing for free, free courses…. I was surprise. Of course later on during my ethics cycle, he said that I was the one who did all this. This was not true. I wrote a knowledge report on him but nothing happen. I then did something wrong and won’t give the details here and went into ethics. I came clean on all this before hand and went to ethics. I spent many months off post and doing MEST work…. and no auditing. The day of my comm ev, I was not prepared. I had asked for my files, commendations for weeks to get ready. The day the comm ev started I was not ready of course. It seems that some people wanted me shot dead and why I had never received my files. I wrote to RTC about it and my files came in. I put everything together showing what I did for scientology during all those years. They did not care. I was almost a year off post and nothing was moving. At the beginning I had been in a small auditing room for many weeks without being let out and being able to walk… It was horrible. At one point, I thought I was going insane. I was then moved with others in the basement. I could not get out neither. During my auditing I blew. I left at night. I had calculated it and knew where to go, at what time…. I went. I won’t say here where and how. But the next day I called in, to get my bags and to bring them to me. They were all so nice to me. Two guys came to see me. No bags of course. I told them I had made the necessary to get out. They spent many hours trying to handle me to come back. I then got my auditor on the phone. Very nice auditor that I like very much. I then decided to go back but mentioned that I was leaving in few weeks done or not done. Note that I had been already in there for a year. A YEAR LOST. I finally got through. I was shown some legal documents to sign. I did not agree with them or what was said. I will spare the details again. Sorry but a security for myself at this point. I signed them in front of a camera and they asked me if I was under the influence of drugs, if I was forced to sign those papers…. I said NO of course, otherwise, I would still be there getting sec checked. I signed those papers. I wanted to get out. I was going nuts in that place. I know a guys who was there for a year and a half. He was not even started with his leaving sec check. I may still be there lol. I made other friends on the decks too. People I had never spoken to. Similar situations and stories as mine.
In fact the church got me to sign all those papers and scared me so I would not speak or say stuff regarding the inside. I know enough to support or confirm what is being said all around the internet on the scam, money, staff situations, living conditions…. I was known to a lot of scientologists and it could be a problem for the church if they would hear about my story……… then I came out. I am building up my life again with studies, training, meeting people, making new friends…. I am having fun. In fact, what scientology is telling you is that life outside is crazy, lots of out ethics…. of course there are some of those stuff but SCIENTOLOGY IS MAKING IT like it was everywhere. This is not true. LOTS OF PEOPLE ARE NICE, FUNNY, WANTING A BETTER PLACE, AGAINST DRUGS, AGAINST CRIMINALITY. LOTS OF ASSOCIATION DO HAVE SOLUTION AS WELL. Of course the church will say “THEY DO NOT HAVE THE TECH”. This is crap, they have answers too. So i decided to come on that forum to speak and meet others. I wanted to see what the other side was saying. Now I understand why the church doesn’t want the staff to access the internet and to read stuff. They know this is dangerous for their survival……. There you have it. A small version. Sorry if I skipped some details and times in there.|